The hell

So yeah what the hell is going here? Why hasn’t anyone checked in? I only see like 4 views. After the first story with a hit of 50 views I drop to 4? I don’t care but come on, I thought people were supposed to tell others about this thing. Well i don’t mind, i’m just trying to get what’s in my head out before I go crazy. And with more people, more I open up, the more I open up, and who ever finds out who I am, well congrats. You beat me.

But my post isn’t going to be a rant about things that I want. Lets face it, I “need” to get my words across. The next few minutes lets indulge in what has happened to  me in the past few days. First, I wrote a song, my favorite team won, my “friend” lost my ipod, valentines day and finally today. Even though everything is bad in that list, what happened today, kind of made up for it.

I finally wrote a new song. It’s like a “lets have a redo” type of a song. About breaking up, then asking for a new beginning and how things should’ave went. This song took me a pretty short time to write because somehow, I can bring back any memory I want back into my head, and express that same feeling. I can do many things that nobody knows about me, and I’m glad for it. The only difference between a song like this and any other song is that i wrote it. Lol, even when sad, I can try to laugh.

Second thing is that my “friend” always gonna put that there because throughout the years, people actually show their true colors and I hate change. So I have hung out with him for a while and he never had the ipod; He stopped bringing it like right after winter break. It like was never with him. Me trusting him thought it was at his house. Then on Monday, the kid mistakes me for that immature, clueless kid i love acting like and says ” I had the thing in one of the pockets of my shorts. I came home and my mom cleaned my room, and with saying that, she accidentally donated some of my clothes and the ipod to a donation home.” Like really, i’m not a fucking 7 year old. Heck even a 4 year old would know that you lost it and don’t have the balls to say it to me. The kid telling me to suck up and ask a girl out is lying to me. I’m not pissed because well he’s going to be the one that suffers. I gave him until Friday to come up with something. Cause when I tell my father, he’ll tell me to forget about him, and trust me, he’ll go apeshit if I say no.

In other news, Valentine’s day was yesterday and I did absolutely nothing. Because I don’t have the guts to tell either My best friend that I love her or to ask out Natasha. I decided to spend my day at home alone like anyone else who spends their time online that outside. But then again, I love being outside so I guess, I just don’t have balls. Well I’ll say i don’t have to the balls to risk my heart getting hurt. I try to keep everything positive in there. I did however buy my mother a chocolate heart box with chocolate candy inside. I also bought her a card. She had to go to work when i got home so i was pretty much alone until 6. My dad comes home telling me that I should get ready cause he’s taking us out. I tell him i’m tired and not hungry, he flips. That day ends with him getting pissed, my mom becoming sad that V-Day gets ruined and I had to go to work with a “Hey fuckface, Guess whose happy as fuck” attitude.

Today was the better of days. It went by fast and I got all my work done. Went to English and was working on the next part of the story. I over do it all and end up choosing the one that likely makes sense rather than the adventurous one. In math, Natasha wore a cute outfit. Blue jeans, Blue top and a blue hair band. Needless to say, she made me like blue again. My favorite colors are Red, Black and White. Oh and speaking of that, my favorite team won 4-0 against Arsenal. BOOM champions league baby! Back to the girl i like… She was out of it today, she laughed at everything and she was even better when she retaliated from every funny insult i shot at her. Seeing her smile somehow gave me a motivation boost so Thank you to that. My best friend……. She didn’t even talk to me today. I sent her a text which failed so i tried saving myself and i failed again and then finally sent it. I hate autocorrect, like seriously, you need my dictionary in there, chage fucking to tucking, switching the hell to theatre. like seriously fix that shit up maaaaannnnnneeeeeeeee.

And now I leave you off with my words of the day. There’s this secret to success and getting what you  want. It may sound gay but be positive. Help friends out help anyone that asks you, out. See what I did there, I saved that sentence. So on a forth, just think about what you want and that’s it, don’t over think it, don’t ask around, don’t show emotion for it. think about it, and sooner or later, it’ll happen. The past few days, I was asking for one day for me to just be laughing the whole time and i got that today. so don’t expect anything, accept everything with joy.

Enjoy the little things in life.




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